How to be a sports fan and why you are probably doing it wrong

And the surprise of the year goes to

For those of you who either aren't in the know, live under a rock or are just generally unfamiliar with the goings on with the various sports ball thingamajiggers, allow me to fill you in on some much needed back story so the rest of this post makes sense.

 Within the state of Michigan there are 2 main universities that are perpetual rivals, the University of Michigan (commonly referred to as U of M or Michigan) and Michigan State (aka MSU or State). The rivalry is very serious, as demonstrated by the fact that with in the state of Michigan it is perfectly acceptable to greet friends and even strangers with a slight insult or jab when discovering that they support the rival team. The rivalry and goes back well over 100 years with the first game being played in 1898. In fact they have played a total of 107 games with  U of M leading the rivalry over all winning 68 games to MSU's 34. However in recent times MSU has dominated the rivalry, winning 7 of the last 8 games.

Now with all that back story out of the way lets talk about why I decided to write this piece. Back on October 17th Michigan and State played again. The rivalry is extra fierce right now because MSU has had an elite team for the past few seasons, and Michigan has a new coach, which they brought in this season to turn the program around after years of mediocrity. So after a back and forth game, Michigan had all but assured the victory when this happened.

Michigan made a mistake on a routine play, and State was able to force a turn over and steal the game in the final seconds. This seemingly impossible turn of events was met with shock by the Michigan fans.

And one fan in particular that had such an extreme reaction it went viral and made national news.

Various news organizations even reported that there was a Michigan fan that had a heart attack at the game. (Based on my research and according to various news outlets, it is unsure if the heart attack was related to the outcome of the game. Also the identity and current status of the person in question are unreported and unknown.)

Now I'm all for being passionate about sports, and I even understand how a particular team can bring people together and even create lasting memories. However when it gets to the point where your fan-hood is affecting your physical health, relationships or your emotional and psychological well being, than it is no longer healthy and something really needs to change, as I had to learn from personal experience.

The pot calling the kettle red

The Chicago Bulls are my team. With close ties to the city of Chicago and being born in the early 80's, I was just old enough to get swept up in the Michael Jordan mania. I would argue that no athlete has ever done for sports fans what MJ did for basketball fans, and Bulls fans in particular. Simply put he made kids of us all again. Whether you were a kid or an adult, watching him play was something close to magical. He seemed to defy both reality and gravity at will, with both electrifying and athletic dunks and impossible to make jump shots (that he seemingly always made). While there were great players before him, and there are now will continue to be great players in the future, nobody since Jordan made me feel that way about the game of basketball, until Derrick Rose came along.

Derrick Rose. A kid from Chicago entering the draft when his hometown team had the number 1 overall pick. It seemed like kismet that he would wind up playing for the team he idolized in his youth. As a fan I watched Derrick from the second he came into the league. For his first few years I never missed a game or practice. If there was a video of Derrick playing basketball, I saw it. The word obsessed wouldn't be be entirely inaccurate about how I felt about both him and my team. I told myself however I was just being a fan.

Having ties to Chicago it's hard to convey to somebody not from Chicago what it's like to love a Chicago team. A city that constantly plays second, third and fourth fiddle to the likes of New York, LA and Miami, having the greatest NBA player of all time be ours means something. Then along came Derrick. Watching him carve up teams with speed and athleticism never seen before at the point guard position, combined with a relentlessness and hunger to his game, returned me to the days of watching another special and beloved bulls player. Needless to say I hadn't felt that way about watching another player since Jordan. Watching Derrick made me feel like I was watching something magical, any given night anything could happen, and then it did happen in the spring of 2012 when he tore his acl.

To say I handled it poorly was an understatement. It affected my relationship, my job, and my schooling. I had been so invested in my team and this player that I was just emotionally numb for a while. I walked around in a funk for weeks, and as that faded away I began to become short tempered and easily irritated with people. On the positive side of things the longer Derrick was out the more I realized how unhealthy my attitude surrounding sports was. I began to try and wean myself off of the raw emotion that I invested in my sports teams, but I couldn't cut ties completely. Part of me held out hope, even as Derrick sat out the entire season, I held on to the hope that once he just came back things would be like there used to be. 

In the fall of 2013, after sitting out for a full season, Derrick was working his way back into playing. He had struggled through the preseason but was starting to look better, until one fateful night in November. I remember watching him as a played against the Portland Trailblazers. He had looked really good that night, scoring 20 points through 3 quarters. Then on a cut to the basket he came up limping. As he limped off the court and eventually went back to the locker room, my only thoughts were, 'oh no, not again.' The feeling of emotional numbness that I had gotten intimately familiar with over the past 18 months spread over me, I just felt that it was going to be a serious injury. Sure enough as the team announced the next day, a 2nd knee injury would keep him out for the second season in a row. 

In that moment, while reading that press release, I completely cut all my emotional ties with my team and with sports.

Taking the fanatic out of the fan

My relationship with sports is now a lot more casual. I don't rage on losses and wins make me happy but don't really make my day or week. Shaking free from the all encompassing emotion of the game has allowed me to actually learn to appreciate the game even more. For all of the benefits that come from supporting a team, just as with anything, over indulgence can be harmful. Allowing your attitude and mental state to be overly influenced by things outside of your control is always a risk, and an unnecessary one at that.

Talking to friends of mine, more than one individual has found themselves either sleeping on the couch or in an argument with their partner when one of their favorite teams lose. I often find myself asking the question, "is it really worth it?" Does your fan-hood really require you to sacrifice everything on the alter of your favorite sports team? Do you really need to celebrate every win like the birth of your first child and every loss like the death of your best friend? 

In the aftermath of deciding to divorce the fanatic out of my fan-hood, I remembered hearing a quote from former ESPN radio host Colin Cowherd that really helped me to change my outlook on sports and stick to it. To paraphrase him he said, "Love your family, your spouse and your kids, like everything else." I encourage you all to do the same. 

Or you could just continue to be this guy.

Whatever work for you.

Until next time,

May your favorite team be just good enough to make the playoffs, only to lose to your biggest rival.